We Need LESS Classroom Management! Tip #3 Support and Follow-up

We know that behavior is only the symptom. So far, we've learned the questions we ask to help build students’ develop self-regulation and self-awareness. 

1. Discover cause. What caused your amygdala to go fast?
2. Name the current feeling. What are you feeling?
3. Identify the replacement feeling. What feeling would you rather be experiencing?
4. Choose next step. What can you do to help you get there?

Now that the student has chosen an action step, how do we continue to support them in their social and emotional development? Two simple and valuable questions: 

• Inquire about support. What support do you need?
• Discuss the impact: How did it go?

Before the student heads off to accomplish their next step, we ask, Is there anything you need from me or someone else to put that step into action? 

Let’s say the student says, Can you help me write out what I’m going to say?

Sure. Let’s do that now.

Next, we follow up. We check in with them after they spoke to the other student.

How did it go? Did it work? Not work? Be sure to be fully present and to listen carefully. First, they’ll need acknowledgment for doing a hard thing. 

You made a tough choice to do what you did. It took courage and you did it!

Second, they’ll need either reinforcement of what they’ve learned, or coaching on how to improve their action step.

Reinforcement. Let’s quickly review what you did. First you discovered the cause for your amygdala to go fast. Next, you named what you were feeling. Third you chose a feeling you’d rather have and then chose to take positive action. Finally you reflected on the result.

Coaching. So it didn’t go as we thought it would. Let’s figure out exactly what didn’t work, and we’ll come up with a better next step.

In this communication with the student, we maintained our composure, through dialoguing with the student. We asked a series of questions that empowered the student to feel, think, and make new choices. The student experienced self-awareness and self-regulation that shifted how they perceive themselves. We responded to unwanted behavior by treating it as a symptom rather than the cause.